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My sweet aroma

I must admit, Mandela Day is a surprise to me every year. I have never planned to do anything & I often wonder if the people so eager to post about their 67minutes do it for “clout” (as the youth say), is it budgeted into philanthropy or charity in companies? Does it really have the impact intended?

I’m not coming for Madiba, I’m just wondering if our hearts have forgotten what charity really is, does anyone check their heart posture in these areas or is it just a task checked off?

There are so many great men and women in our story who gave their lives to a cause, fought and stayed gracious, and will stay alive forever in hearts and history books. Have you ever thought about the kind of legacy you would leave behind? I think about it more than is healthy I’m sure… What do people see and feel when they are around you? How do you leave people feeling?

Do you think your presence is a sweet aroma, or if you’re really honest, could you be more like a thorn caught deep in soft skin, or perhaps that unknown something we can’t see stuck in the eye- distorting vision.

It disturbs me that thorn like people can throw some money around on Mandela Day, & since our world now thinks that money is more valuable than good character, they get the praise they’ve paid for.

 

This month I want to hold myself to a higher standard – don’t get it twisted, I’m a caring someone, I’ve just been through turmoil that knocked me off my feet, & over the past few days I have been reminded that there are beautiful souls all around me & my God sees every tear and swoops in to Romans 8:28 my situation. We just don’t know what people are facing and the smallest act of kindness could be just what someone needs – I want to be the glimmer of hope because that’s what I’ve so desperately needed. So, maybe compliment a stranger, buy a coffee at DC Coffee for a mystery person, reach out to someone, pray for your loved ones, decide to smile & let it go instead of holding onto something that won’t make you any sweeter. Perhaps?

Laurien ❤️

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My piece of this existence

Does anyone else scrutinize everything, holding a microscope up to the things that are “just that way“? I feel confused more often than not. People, situations, reactions, economics & statistics; all very confusing. Or perhaps not everyone is tormented by thoughts – well, how does that feel?!

When I was much younger I always felt so out of place, was it the fact that I moved around so much, or have I always been a rather sensitive soul? I’m leaning towards the latter. There were a whole lot of ingredients that created a very angry little person… add 1 cup of unrefined frustration, 2 litres of Whisky Tango Foxtrot, and 5kgs of “what do I do with this feeling” and out of the oven came an overcooked, spicy, unbalanced meal, heavy on the emotional calories.

I believe I’ve become a different person over and over, finally having the ability to soften, become (sometimes too) flexible, learn the fine art of forgiveness, and able to recognise the beauty I’ve worked at cultivating in myself. Unfortunately there are some lessons that are significantly harder than others, some things weighing so much they bend your will and break your spirit, but being soaked in superglue makes putting them down feel like a constant battle. Reflecting on it all, I’m faced with the reality that the harsh, abrasive me that once was, was just a scared young girl that didn’t know how else to feel protected.

I often wonder about people who lack empathy and wonder if I would be more successful in business if I were one of them. Would I make better business decisions? Would I be able to let go of hurtful emotions instead of packing them in this big suitcase to carry around on my head? No wonder my neck is sore 😂. Empathetically challenged people are much like statistics to me, – they obviously have a reason for existing but make no sense to me no matter how much I try to understand. I must admit, having little to no emotions fogging up the place could be kinda nice…

I sat on a pedicure recliner, listening to James Ingram on Saturday morning with the 1st draft of this blog. I’m sure my music selection prompted the trip down the railway of my life… & I found myself concerned about the weight of these words & how I’d manage to get this to relate to the June promos😵‍💫 Today I’m like, here’s the blog, hope you like it!

On days when deep in thought, finding more questions than answers, trying to make it all make sense; I can’t help but be freshly grateful for my job, my phenomenal staff, and the people who love me. Sunday’s message was titled “Comes With It” – Are we prepared to navigate the trial/persecution/hardship that comes with the blessing? We are often so focussed on the challenges and pain that come before and with the blessing that it becomes so hard to understand that it’s necessary; just like the pain with the birth.

June has begun & brought with it a need for fluffy socks, extra blankets and the soup pots. Before you dive in may I ask, what do you want to carry with you this month?

I’m taking a bigger helping of compassion for myself, acceptance of all the pieces of me – giving no apologies for the deep oceans that create the unique layers of who I am.

Above all, I’m going to try my best to carry in me a well of faith, that even when I can’t see clearly, I’ll know if I put my pale down this well, I’ll be sure to retrieve an overflow.

Let’s try to welcome the challenges as the process that one must follow to get to the great. Here’s to a wonderful, beautiful June for us all.

 

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What soothes you?

Hi, I’m Laurien and I’m a procrastinator. 🤦🏽‍♀️I have a growing talent for leaving things to the very last minute, and the May blog has been a prime example.

Putting my head in the sand when I don’t feel like facing a task is fast becoming a hobby, when I should in fact, be getting more task orientated!

May really isn’t a favourite month to write my thoughts to be honest. May = Mothers’ day, &  is a tricky one for me – the past few years have been interesting to navigate. A word for the younger generation, don’t be so keen to declare that you don’t want kids; one day you wake up 35 & fall in love with some lil people & discover you had all the maternal bones all along 🫢

April is our birthday month (the shop & I ) & just as I’m getting settled into the new age, May peeps her motherly head around the corner to remind me of my womb that no-one has called home yet. – RUDE-

I was relaxing, walking, eating, dancing & drinking on a wine farm in Cpt for a few days, & I didn’t feel the urge to rush back from the beach to write this blog – It’s the honesty for me!

The past few days I’ve sat with some thoughts; are we experiencing more of the same in different ways? I took another bash at a dating site recently, I’ve always known my S.O wouldn’t be found there, but I was admittedly without entertainment… until I saw my (not single) cousin’s profile & proceeded to delete it, yet again! As I stared at the familiar pictures, I couldn’t help but wonder… am I existing in a time not meant for me?
Fam! Carrie Bradshaw lifts my spirits- even in the 90s, things were much the same with the exception of fake profiles & way too much social media, what is it about relatability that settles the spirit?

 

When all the frozen yoghurt & SATC reruns fail to hit the spot, my next best is my Good mood in jars, conveniently found in my bathroom cabinet.

The slight sagging of cheeks (& heart) are made well with the floating fingers over my face, the aroma that behaves like I’d imagine the balm of Gilead did. The meticulously crafted texture has a way of softening my mind. Bliss!

Look, it won’t change things around me, but it somehow changes me, slightly shifting my view, my mood; it sings me a lullaby with the promise of of a better tomorrow.