Yes, it’s February… the time when singles are either looking for a place to protest the scam that is love, or a place to find some love; when wives are wondering if their husbands will be once again complaining about this money making scheme that they are pressured into taking part in, & the newly “in-love” couples wanting to drown their S.O in a stream of chocolates, overly priced roses & weird looking teddy bears.
I so clearly remember Valentine’s Day in high school, the students coming around with a rose or a very dodgy tasting ❤ chocolate that gave us this horrible false sense of love🤦♀️- what exactly were our teachers trying to teach us? mxm
To be really honest, I have been guilty of looking for someone else’s love for/approval of me, to then be able to fully love who I am, how twisted & upside down is that? Until I learned, allowed myself to see, & fully accepted all the beautiful (& not so beautiful) parts of me that make me who I am, I had no idea how to filter the people in my life – scary, right?! I spent so many years unable to look at my own beauty that I minimised it to fit into someone else’s mould, only to wake up months, sometimes years later, discovering that these people took from me & gave nothing, sadly the only things they built were my insecurities.
I never quite understood the term “finding yourself” but I get it now, the place where you can be completely happy & feel real love coming from YOU. Being able to love comes from understanding what (&WHO) real love is. There is no person or relationship that can do that for you, & looking for love in someone else’s hands will never end well.
1 Corinthians 13:4Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
I think “self love” is vitally important , I also think some people might be taking it a little out of context. When does it stop being a way to care for yourself & start being just plain selfish? Before proclaiming your self-love journey, be honest about your intentions & do some introspection; are you taking some time to give yourself the love you need by making your favourite meal, listening to the music that fires up your soul, reading a book that speaks to you etc, or are you hiding behind the guise of “self-love” to camouflage your selfishness (I said what I said!)
Self-Love isn’t you not wanting to hear someone out, seeing yourself as more important than some one else, or eluding to the fact that your love for yourself is more important than loving others, I know the man upstairs can easily help you figure that out.
So, this Valentines day & month of love, I’m committing to STILL loving me. Still figuring out, establishing & re-establishing my boundaries, still re-aligning myself when I’m not as strong as I want to be, still practicing the kind of self-love that will make me able to love the people around me better, to fill my own cup with love, kindness, patience, gratitude, to make me able to pour into the people around me. What are you committing to?
How do you see the month of love & what are your views on self-love?
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